It's been a while since I've written a post where you were cringing for me and disgusted by me and peeing your pants at the same time, so I figure it's about time.
The other night, I had taken my shower and was in my pajamas, watching tv. I was exceptionally tired and just enjoying drooling while I was watching Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy. K-ster hadn't come home yet and I was in a trance like state, but I was pretty sure I hadn't fallen asleep at all.
I went to the bathroom and happened to look at my underwear. You do it too, right? Unless you're browsing through a catalog or reading graffiti on the girls' bathroom wall, there isn't much else do but look at your underwear, right? How else would you discover things like this or this?
So, there I was, all clean from my shower and I looked down and saw this. It's kind of blurry, but I don't think we need it to be crystal clear to know what we're seeing.
But, here's the thing. I had been out of the shower for less than 30 minutes. I was just sitting on the couch, not doing anything.
And then I started to panic. OMG did I fall alseep and go to the bathroom right on the couch?
I started to think back to what I had been doing. I was pretty sure I saw all of Wheel of Fortune. And didn't nod off during the commercials. I was pretty sure I hadn't gone to the bathroom anywhere, but especially not on the couch.
And I still felt pretty clean. That just out of the shower kind of clean.
Was I having an out of body experience? And if so, was the REALLY the experience I should be having? Really? In the bathroom, of all places??? The universe really has it in for me.
So, I did the only thing I could. The only reasonable action that someone in my position could do.
I smelled it.
And you know what?
It was soap! I had taken a bath after my shower and my soap was down to little bits like this.